Oh yes, I'm an expert where smells are concerned. I'm the person standing over rotting body parts, g

[ridicully]

Two things:
Saw Shrek 2 on Thursday. There are no words to describe how much I love this movie.

And I know there are the usual recurring discussions about this thing anywhere there is talk about fic, but *why* do men in fic so often smell like something sweet? Vanilla? Oranges? Cinnamon? Apples? Chocolate?
People don't naturally smell of any of these things. They have a general body odour, altered a bit and stronger when they sweat. They smell like things to which they have contact, things they eat or drink. Deodorants or perfumes, the soap they're using.
Ok, Snape smelling like bubotuber pus s doesn't make for a very erotic tale, but why only sweet? Especially in men? *I* hate smelling like something sweet, and while I'm certainly not a paragon of femininity, I'd like to think that most men - even if they're gay - are less feminine than me (Care to talk about stereotypes? ;) .
What's wrong with a bit of sweat? Why do the characters only taste like the alcoholic beverage they've been drinking? (Oh right, because they don't drink *that* much).
How about wood smoke from all those fires? (How could I forget: magic)
Don't they ever eat anything containing garlic or onions? What about vinegar as a smell? Not good?
Musk is good, too much musk is makes me think of deer.
And because I love to google silly things, I looked up 'smells' and 'index'. Chemical formulas of different smells

Actually, I know that using a well known smell serves as some sort of instant characterization and I'm only complaining because I want those men to smell like something *I* like (note how I left 'lemon' and 'mint' out of the list of annoying smells [But they're not sweet, more ... fresh] *g*).